Thursday, May 7, 2020

May 2020 Eyesore Cinema rentals: short reviews

Here are some reviews of five films we recently rented from Eyesore Cinema  -1176 Bloor West - one of the city's last remaining sources of rental video.



ALICE SWEET ALICE was at one point titled "Communion" which is a title that makes a lot more sense in that this film is absolutely steeped in Catholicism and growing up in a hollering, dysfunctional Catholic family in Patterson, New Jersey. And there are some murders, and the killer wears those creepy translucent face masks which gives the whole affair the feel of one of Devo's early music videos. It's a low-budget creeper that makes good use of Patterson location shooting and period set dressing, marred only slightly by the refusal of the male cast to trim their very 1976 dry-look haircuts. Apparently the director got excommunicated for an earlier film; ALICE is his response. If you aren't as invested in the Papist trappings you might not get the intended emotional beats, but ultimately it's suitably unsettling, if at times weirdly suggesting the entire film is a setup for a modern-day sequel.



BLOW OUT:  DePalma's BLOW UP remake/reinterpretation/whatever tries to go in about four directions at once - a less paranoid THE CONVERSATION, a commentary on slasher movies, an actual slasher movie, a Kennedy assassination picture, an educational movie informing non-Philadelphians that a holiday called "Liberty Day" actually exists. Come for the great cinematography, stay for the gritty 1981 Philly - it's like gritty 1981 NYC but without the charm - and enjoy the good Travolta performance and a terrific Nancy Allen. Ultimately the pieces don't quite fit together, and the story feels almost disinterested in the whys of what happens, but it's a good funhouse ride while it lasts.



SOMETHING WICKED THIS WAY COMES: Disney's 1983 'dark fantasy' version of the Ray Bradbury story about the Dark Carnival that rolls into your small town, pushes all your midlife crisis buttons, and turns you into a sideshow attraction is pretty much the Walt Disney Company's midlife crisis writ large on the screen, an expensive misfire without purpose or vision. If you wanna see character actors wander through backlots, bitch about their regrets, and dodge Disney special effects department animation while two kid actors fail to compel or inspire, this is the movie for you. Seriously, if your movie needs a child to work opposite Jason Robards, that kid has to be charismatic and appealing, and the kids in this picture are neither, especially up against Jonathan Pryce, who absolutely nails the evil ringmaster role. He gives 120% at all times, hissing and twirling and working those brows. Pam Grier is wasted, James Horner's soundtrack is James Hornering it all over the place trying to liven things up, I saw this in '83 and there's a reason I barely remember it. Apparently the production was its own nightmare carnival, involving reshoots, expensive special effects sequences being entirely cut, Horner's soundtrack a last-minute addition, you name it, they fudged it. Pass.



THE MAN FROM HONG KONG is an Australian/Hong Kong coproduction starring former Flying Guillotine Master Jimmy Wang Yu as the titular Man From Hong Kong. If you've seen the Ozploitation documentary "Not Quite Hollywood" or just the trailer for "Stunt Rock" you might have an idea of what was on director Brian Trenchard-Smith's mind: high speed car chases, hang gliding, and lots of wall-smashing, glass-breaking, board-shattering fists-furious kung fu. This film delivers exactly what it promises, a gritty James Bond with the sweat, violence, and sneers dialed way up. Even ex-Bond George Lazenby is there, a dry-look heel with a great mustache and a willingness to get down and dirty with the stuntmen and to let Jimmy Wang Yu knock the holy hell out of him. Trenchard-Smith never saw a stunt scene he was willing to cut even a fraction out of, and we get to see every slo-mo instant of the crashing, bashing, smashing as Wang Yu, with an assist from Hugh Keays-Byrne - you know, "Toecutter" from MAD MAX! - works his way up to Lazenby's international narcotics gangster. It's rare to see an exploitation movie that actually lives up to the poster, but this one does.



THE BIRD WITH CRYSTAL PLUMAGE is Dario Argento's first feature and you can see Argento straining against the conventions of the murder-mystery genre; not as dreamlike or as evocative as his later features, but there's a charm to the picture that comes from all the late 60s Italian design, the spy-movie hired killer subplot, and a square-jawed American hero who's gonna get to the bottom of this, darn it. It's no SUSPIRIA, but it's worth a look.

What will we rent next time? Stay tuned!